While watching my sons make their Halloween costumes this year, the eldest kidlet said, "It's always hardest battling yourself 'cuz you already know the weak points to exploit and if you win, you actually lose." "What if we are all Spy vs. Spy, you know, versions of ourselves hiding behind diguises trying to blow ourselves up in new and scary ways?"
Sometimes I think my kids are far older that 9 and 11, their conversations are oftentimes so profound that all I can do is take dictation and pray that someday I too will learn this wisdom. They did get me thinking about self-destructive behaviors, about how as a creative, I talk myself out of creating things, self edit, and otherwise decide that safe is easier.
Creating anything requires a certain degree of bravery. To make a mark is a deliberate act of courage that harnesses the honest resolve necessary to light the fuse and expose ourself to the enemy, knowing full well that it'll leave us in a vulnerable position. Battles aren't won by timidity, they are won by bold action and taking risks. When the enemy is us... the peanut gallery of naysaying voices in our heads, perhaps the bravest thing one can do is stare at the blank canvas or page and break the surface tension by employing an uncharacteristic broad stroke of determination.